Friday, September 17, 2010

389 The Talk? Already?!

After taking the kids to feed the ducks last week we ran through the drive thru at McDonald's. I say ran through, though it was dinner time and the line was long. The girls started talking about college and it went a little something like this. (paraphrasing of course)

K: I wish we were sister's so we could be roommates at Ole Miss.
Me: You don't have to be sisters to be roommates. You don't even have to know each other to be roommates in college.
K: M, we are going to be roommates, right?
M: Yeah! It will be so much fun!
K: And if we have babies we can watch each other's kids!
Me: *brain aneurism* *heart palpitations* *major freak out*
Me: You won't have babies in college!
K: We might.
Me: No, you won't. If you do I will ground you and you will never leave the house.
(calm down people, in reality if we have to ever face this I will be totally supportive)
Me: UHHHH! YEAH YOU CAN! *internal discussion with myself as to what can and cannot be said to eight year olds, one of which is not your child*
Me: You would have made some bad decisions to have babies in college.
K and M: Like what?!
Me: *CRAP CRAP CRAP* You are too young to learn about it, but before you are old enough to make those decisions we will tell you.
K and M: *blank stares*

We have of course had little discussions about them being too young to have boyfriends. One of their friends kissed another boy, so we have had that discussion. But when do you have THE talk? And do you just gloss over some subjects? I thought surely I had until she at least hit double digits.

There are so many television shows that address teenage pregnancies and parenthood. It happens. It even happens to really good kids, but I do NOT want it to happen to my child. How do I make sure that it does not happen? What will scare the beejeezus out of her so that she will run screaming from the mere thought of sex when she is older? Or at the very least running with a condom in her hand....


Please please please feel free to leave comments with suggestions, links, humorous statements, and anything you think applies. Open a discussion. I can't be the only one with these thoughts. Right? RIGHT?!


rachel whetzel said...

Well, I'm a prime example of how even talking and having a really open relationship with your kids doesn't mean much. I'm officially a gramma, even though the baby didn't make it. :P We've been having age appropriate "talks" since Ian was little. I highly recommend the book Protecting the Gift. READ READ READ it. It's good for boys AND girls. Still, IMO, it's good to start the talk well before you actually NEED it. Helps keep things from being uncomfortable.

Also, Just so you know, and nothing to do with birds OR bees, it's really hard for me to visit blogs with black backgrounds and white writing. TOTALLY farks up my eyes. I barely made it through your post, and now I can't see right.

Lust and Confused said...

I reckon 8 is a bit young for much detail... but it's never too early to start laying a foundation for later I think...

You may want to have a listen to the Sex is Fun podcast for yourself (and perhaps go to the forums) because they had a few eps that included useful information for parents on how to deal with kids of all ages in relation to sexuality.

And when kids are a bit older, Scarleteen (often referenced by Sex is Fun) may also be a good resource to point them at.

Not a parent yet myself, so I hope any of that is at all useful ;)

Anonymous said...

Powerful post.